An emotional connection being a MUST to ejaculate

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King bed
King bed
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Re: An emotional connection being a MUST to ejaculate

Post by footnassman »

garyb wrote: Wed Jan 05, 2022 12:13 pm I've been watching this thread since the beginning and will make one comment but I'm not sure my recent situation is related or not. If not, perhaps it needs its own thread.

Within the last couple of months, I've had difficulty in orgasming with my wife, particularly during PIV. There was one occasion on our 40th anniversary trip were I couldn't even orgasm with OS or using my own hand after failing to reach a PIV orgasm. Fortunately she convinced me to take my toy (fleshlight) and after trying with OS she was able get me to orgasm with it. During our vacation, we thought it might be alcohol related as we generally had a drink in our hand all day but tend to sip and never even got buzzed. It was an all-inclusive resort so the drinks may have been diluted, who knows.

It happened again last night and praise my wife, she allowed me to try for a long time (20-30 minutes) and although I felt PONR approaching, barely, just as soon as I did, it disappeared. I eventually rolled over and with her by my side, was able self-stimulate to orgasm in about 5 minutes.

I love our time together and it always feels fantastic. I'm always turned on by her and love to touch and cuddle with her. I just told her today, I can't wait until we retire so we cuddle in bed as long as we want. She is being very patient and understanding. I'm at a loss for an explanation. Nothing has really changed, medications, physical fitness, work stress except maybe some elevated stress concerning one of our children, but nothing too serious.
I dont know if this is accurate, or not, Gary. I will offer what I read, and then read into, in your words.

As a preface, I am in healthcare and have been for 30 yrs. In my experience, when a MAN admits to a little bit of stress, but "nothing too serious", it is often my observation and experience that the stress he feels is FAR GREATER than what he is outwardly stating. We tend to bottle up, not want to complain, whine or express ourselves (the words I chose, I chose intentionally....because it is how WE often think we sound if we dare voice the impact of stress on us). I would, with no other knowledge of you than what I have just read, think that this stressor is a source of much greater worry than you are willing to acknowledge to us, and likely, even to yourself. Or, perhaps there is another stressor lurking that you arent openly dealing with??? Not trying to sound "hocus pocus"....just too many similar matters from too many men for too many years for me not to mention the possibility.

I thank you for reaching out. I hope that you do continue to pursue this, even if I am FAR off base. I wish you well.
Last edited by footnassman on Wed Jan 05, 2022 12:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Queen bed
Queen bed
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Re: An emotional connection being a MUST to ejaculate

Post by garyb »

SeekingChange wrote: Wed Jan 05, 2022 12:18 pm GaryB, what you have shared, we have dealt with some too, but it was related to his testosterone being low. That was part of the signs that pushed him to get his hormones checked. This was why we brought it up to his hormone doctor, we thought it could be hormone related again.
I just visited my endocrinologist last month and my levels are still in the high-normal range. (884 ng/dL) Nothing has changed there either.
Mike smith
Posts: 69
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: An emotional connection being a MUST to ejaculate

Post by Mike smith »

Since I am an octogenarian, I am quite sure that has some bearing on my response, but up till last fall I averaged probably three to four orgasms a week. My Endocrinologist reduced my testosterone because my hemoglobin was to high and my sexual ability immediately tanked. Now I am lucky if I can pound out two a week with great effort.
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