Wife sometimes gets a nagging, constant feeling of having to pee after sex

[spaceghost]

She isn't post-menopause. Hasn't started yet. She just turned 46, so I suppose it won't be much longer. We made love Saturday morning, and she hasn't felt any itching or constant urge to pee. I didn't stimulate her with precum this time though, and I want to rule that out as a possibility.

[DoveGrey]

I've been thinking about your situation. I know that I can't leave Dh's ejaculate on my skin too long or it causes irritation. Just the thought of using it for stimulation is unpleasant. Your wife and I are the same age, and I was reading that increased itchiness of the vulva can be a sign of perimenopause.

Another thing I was thinking is something I was told in a women's health awareness session at my university's clinic. Having sex infrequently (once every week or two) can trigger a UTI in part because the body isn't as used to the irritation of the friction, etc. I wonder if the weekly session is just enough to give her a mild UTI that her body is able to flush out without antibiotics. But that's purely conjecture.

It's a good sign that your change in activity this weekend led to a better outcome. I hope that continues and that you've solved the problem.

[MrEden]

UTI--for sure, pee after sex to clean everything.

[spaceghost]

I've been thinking about your situation. I know that I can't leave Dh's ejaculate on my skin too long or it causes irritation. Just the thought of using it for stimulation is unpleasant. Your wife and I are the same age, and I was reading that increased itchiness of the vulva can be a sign of perimenopause.

Hmm.. This is the information I have been looking for, I think. I never really did it before our sexual hiatus, but since we've resumed she's enjoyed me rubbing my precum directly onto her clitoris very much. She's always been excited at the sight of precum drooling down the sides of my penis, and using it as direct stimulation is something new that has made her so excited. The sensation and the sounds it provides helps drive her over the edge pleasantly. Maybe if her period finishes before the weekend, we may have sex Saturday without the precum play and then do it Sunday. Fitting sex into our week is an uphill battle. I had to have it out with my wife with some very necessary arguments in November just to get her to become sexual again. (Long story I'd rather not get into now. It involves PTSD from her being hit by a car 4 years ago.) Now that I've reclaimed my marriage, I'm picking my battles carefully and I'm grateful for any sex at all, considering the 3 1/2 years of loneliness I felt prior to this new beginning in life.