What limits did you have before marriage?

What limits should we set before marriage?
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Paradox
Hammock
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Re: What limits did you have before marriage?

Post by Paradox »

The initial limits you had, and the slow but steady progression of sexual/intimate activities were almost exactly like ours, but on a different time table. It really only lasted three weeks for us, and then we became engaged and pledged to one another. We viewed that bond as unbreakable, and that the church marriage was only a formality. As soon as we agreed to get married, we pledged ourselves to one another before our congregation, and did the wedding license requirements with parents a few short seven months later. (I know, I know, there is some faulty logic and theology here, and what is just is, so don't pick on me, please.)
My fiancé had a bit too much to drink three times in our pre-engagement period (remember, three weeks), and took her clothes off. Two of the times were just her top stuff off, but once, while I went to the bathroom, I came out to find her completely naked and stretched out on the bed in my apartment. I had the clearness of purpose to help her put her clothes back on each of these times. I wanted mutual commitment. Once we got engaged, I lost that principle somewhere and never found it again.
RuggedAmerican
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Joined: Sat May 25, 2024 5:52 am

Re: What limits did you have before marriage?

Post by RuggedAmerican »

Paradox wrote: Thu Jun 20, 2024 3:43 pm The initial limits you had, and the slow but steady progression of sexual/intimate activities were almost exactly like ours, but on a different time table. It really only lasted three weeks for us, and then we became engaged and pledged to one another. We viewed that bond as unbreakable, and that the church marriage was only a formality. As soon as we agreed to get married, we pledged ourselves to one another before our congregation, and did the wedding license requirements with parents a few short seven months later. (I know, I know, there is some faulty logic and theology here, and what is just is, so don't pick on me, please.)
My fiancé had a bit too much to drink three times in our pre-engagement period (remember, three weeks), and took her clothes off. Two of the times were just her top stuff off, but once, while I went to the bathroom, I came out to find her completely naked and stretched out on the bed in my apartment. I had the clearness of purpose to help her put her clothes back on each of these times. I wanted mutual commitment. Once we got engaged, I lost that principle somewhere and never found it again.
Regarding the pledging marriage and then taking care of the license stuff later, I don't see an issue with that, so long as you considered yourselves married and others know that.
Rugged American (as called by my European wife)
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