Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Where are the limits? What’s “okay” but dangerous?
Forum rules
Post in this section can be seen by guests and search engines.
Mapleleaf
Cot
Cot
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by Mapleleaf »

LoveJoined wrote: Wed Nov 08, 2023 9:57 am No two people are alike, Christian or not. Maybe you can discuss it with him. Beliefs vary you may want to know his beliefs about sex.

Neither of us had a fantasy about our wedding night. Never heard of anyone that did except that it would be special. Or fear if they were a virgin.
All this is best talked about with your future husband because we are all a little different. Lingerie is a yes. Wedding night I don't have expectations other than just enjoying my bride. The more you are open to try new things and just communicate with each other the better I think. Happy to answer questions if it's helpful.
User avatar
Crow
California King
California King
Posts: 688
Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2021 7:18 pm

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by Crow »

MrMarried wrote: Fri Nov 10, 2023 5:39 am One thing I did with my wife on our Honeymoon and thereafter is 'inspection.' I'd open up her legs, look at her vagina, and I loved to look all over her naked body and inspect it. She's a kind of medium-light toned Asian, but I think the only time I've actually seen her blush, a darker shade not really red, was when I had her thighs open, enjoying the view of her genitals. We Christian men aren't supposed to look at porn, but I sure enjoyed the guilt-free view of my wife's naked body and I still do.
How did your brand new wife feel about having you open her legs to be inspected?
JoeG
Double
Double
Posts: 64
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2022 11:20 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by JoeG »

We did something similar to appreciate each other's bodies.
MrMarried
Fell out of ...
Fell out of ...
Posts: 1487
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by MrMarried »

Crow wrote: Tue Nov 28, 2023 1:06 pm
MrMarried wrote: Fri Nov 10, 2023 5:39 am One thing I did with my wife on our Honeymoon and thereafter is 'inspection.' I'd open up her legs, look at her vagina, and I loved to look all over her naked body and inspect it. She's a kind of medium-light toned Asian, but I think the only time I've actually seen her blush, a darker shade not really red, was when I had her thighs open, enjoying the view of her genitals. We Christian men aren't supposed to look at porn, but I sure enjoyed the guilt-free view of my wife's naked body and I still do.
How did your brand new wife feel about having you open her legs to be inspected?
Neither of our language skills were that advanced in the other's languages. I gather she felt a little shy/embarrassed since she blushed, at first, but that went away pretty quickly. She let me do it and went along with it, so I think she was okay with it. This sort of thing was quickly followed by sexual activity.
User avatar
SLS
Hammock
Hammock
Posts: 1234
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am
Location: SC, USA, Earth, Sol System, Milky Way

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by SLS »

Violetwinters wrote: Wed Nov 08, 2023 9:44 amHow do Christian men feel about lingerie?
How do Christian men feel about using swear words during sexual activity?
Single guys, do you have an ideal wedding night in mind?
Single guys what is your opinion on “naughty girls”
How can I make my husband have a really good orgasm
Would you prefer to finish in your wife or pull out/cum in a condom?
The exact answers to these specific questions will depend on your future husband. For example some guys like lingerie while others prefer their wives to be au natural throughout a sexual encounter.

If you are in a relationship that is getting serious take the time to discuss views on sex and sexual expectations with your significant other. Keep in mind though that what y'all think you might like or dislike can change based on how things work in real life, and that's okay.
Do men fantasize about their wedding/wedding night as much as women?
Yes. Definitely discuss wedding night expectations and planning but don't feel you have to rigidly hold to a set scenario. It's okay if things don't go "according to plan".
How long should I expect my husband to last
Most men do not last long on their wedding night. As sex becomes more regular the more control is learned. IIRC the average time of sustained intercourse is somewhere around 7 minutes.

To close here are some general tips:

1. Understand you are an equal partner in the sexual relationship. Explore your own sexuality and share that journey with your husband.

2. Be responsive and playful. If your husband is doing something that you find emotionally or physically pleasurable let him know verbally (words, moaning, sexy talk, etc.) and with body language. Also being playful with your spouse in bed (and in general) is a big intimacy builder.

3. Be confident. Many women have doubts about their body image due to various cultural expectations. Be confident in your body and sexuality and the joy it can bring you and your husband in your marriage.

4. Practice self-care. Sex is not an obligation. If there are problems in the sexual relationship (sexual pain, disagreements over frequency, husband isn't doing his part to sexually satisfy, husband is addicted to porn, etc.) you are not obligated to just "grin and bear" it. Work to solve the root causes of such problems instead of putting a bandaid of subpar emotionally draining sex on the issue.
Happily married to Serafina for 9 years. She is my Venus. ::luv2
User avatar
BroadSword
King bed
King bed
Posts: 331
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by BroadSword »

My answers have probably been covered by others but I'll toss them into the mix anyway.

How do Christian men feel about lingerie? It's going to depend on guy. I love my wife in lingerie. I also tend to like the racier stuff - lace as opposed to silk or linen, see-thru, cupless, crotchless. My wife isn't a big fan of the racy stuff but will wear it on occasion for me. She also prefers certain styles over others due to fit. This will be something that should be discussed with your fiance (once you have one) at some point.

How do Christian men feel about using swear words during sexual activity? I don't have an issue with cuss words in general and especially in the bedroom (I figure that if you substitute an acceptable word, like "fudge", for a cuss word, like an "f-bomb", then the acceptable word has now become a cuss word due to intent, but that's a topic for another day). I find sexual slang terms rather than the clinical terms much sexier.

Do men fantasize about their wedding/wedding night as much as women? I definitely fantasized more about the wedding night than the wedding.

Do you have any tips or pointers that I should try with my future husband that you would want your spouse to do? Again, this is something that should be discussed with your fiance once the time comes, but I would recommend being adventurous from the git-go. Each should be open to any suggestion from the other. Be willing to try any position. Be willing to perform oral sex on each other (as others have suggested, though, don't do him on the wedding night as I'm sure he won't be able to hold back :) ). Consider anal sex. Get various toys involved. I wish my wife and I had been as adventurous in the early years as we are now after 30 years.

Single guys what is your opinion on “naughty girls” As I said, I like it when my wife cuts loose in the bedroom. Does that make her "naughty"? I don't think so.

How long should I expect my husband to last If you're both virgins I wouldn't count on long. But the plus side is he'll probably be ready to go again in little of no time so what you lose in time per session you make up for in total number of sessions.

How can I make my husband have a really good orgasm This will be something that will take some time to discover. The first time he'll consider great just because it's your first time. But over time y'all will learn what he likes best of all. And think of the fun you'll have learning that. :)

Would you prefer to finish in your wife or pull out/cum in a condom? I finished inside her on our honeymoon and that's normally what we do to this day. She does allow me to cum on her (usually breasts) occasionally for fun. And sometimes I'll wear a condom just for the novelty of something different (or if we're doing AS).
musicmaker86
Cot
Cot
Posts: 6
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by musicmaker86 »

I'm a single male 37yrs old, unmarried and also virgin. Thought I'd share my thoughts.
How do Christian men feel about lingerie?
I think lingerie is beautiful and sexy. Would love it if my future wife enjoyed wearing it.
How do Christian men feel about using swear words during sexual activity
I wouldn't have a problem with this. I think swearing in mixed company isn't good, but I would absolutely do it around my wife as I would see her as someone I can be more open with and expose more of myself to - which sometimes includes swearing, mostly when I'm trying to be funny but also to express more intense emotions.
Do men fantasize about their wedding/wedding night as much as women?
I tend to fantasize more about what a sex life with my future wife would be like in general, versus the actual wedding night itself. But I do think about it occasionally - like how exciting it will be and about what we might do, as inexperienced lovers.
Single guys, do you have an ideal wedding night in mind?
Do you have any tips or pointers that I should try with my future husband that you would want your spouse to do?
I think an ideal wedding night for me would be if she openly matches my excitement and eagerness for sex and isn't afraid to show it. I would want her to not be afraid to ask me to do things. To be vocal and expressive.
Single guys what is your opinion on “naughty girls”
"Naughty" is such a generic word that can mean so many different things, but on the whole - I would love it if my future wife was a "naughty" girl. Someone who loves sex and sexual play, someone who is adventurous and curious to try lots of new things. Someone who initiates sex and sexual play.
How long should I expect my husband to last
Very hard to answer. Every man is different. There's a good chance that if he's inexperienced, he may not last too long in the heat of the moment - but try to take it as a compliment, haha
How can I make my husband have a really good orgasm
This will only come with time and practice. Learning your husbands body and what kinds of things he likes. Be open and communicate well with him about his desires as well as your own. For myself, the best kind of orgasm I could have is where I know my wife is enjoying herself as well.
Would you prefer to finish in your wife or pull out/cum in a condom?
I think I would prefer to not wear a condom - I want to feel as naturally close, skin to skin, with my wife.

Best wishes!
Mike smith
California King
California King
Posts: 733
Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am

Re: Wanting tips on how to best pleasure my future husband

Post by Mike smith »

How do Christian men feel about lingerie?
How do Christian men feel about using swear words during sexual activity?
Single guys, do you have an ideal wedding night in mind?
Single guys what is your opinion on “naughty girls”
How can I make my husband have a really good orgasm
Would you prefer to finish in your wife or pull out/cum in a condom?
I pontificated about the philosophy of it earlier, for what it’s worth here are my feelings about the specifics you listed
Lingerie: The wrapping can get in the way of the contents.
Swear words, … used properly no words are swear words; clinical terminology in the bedroom takes it to the medical exam room. Yuk! One doesn’t talk about elbows clinically, why so about sex organs or sex acts?
I’m an old married and I fantasize about wedding night routinely. A fanciful picture I often think of is my bride exiting the bathroom in her birthday suit, hands on her hip, exclaiming “anybody interested in pu…….? But then that’s just the horny old man in me speaking.
Again, in the bedroom the only naughty girl is the prude. If you are speaking of blatantly sexual conduct, bring it on!
Nothing is more pleasing than a pleased or satisfied partner. If it’s good for you, it’s great for him
Pull out or condom, ? If you are talking about birth control, neither is ideal, condoms are safer, pull out is probably more fun. We used both and had 3 children…..
So those are the musings of a horny old man. Sex is very Individual, and probably no two peoples desires and tastes ar the same.
Post Reply

Return to “What Is Okay?”