Who Said It First?

[LovingHimAlways]

I tripped over a study that explored the words I love you and their first-time use in a relationship - who says it first and what influences the timing. In the American culture on average, it's the guy. That held true in my relationship. I knew I loved him, but was not about to rock the boat by saying so first. I remember not wanting to put pressure on him, so I intentionally let him lead.

How about all of you? Who said it first? Did you hold back like I did, or did you take initiative? Was there a reason for your decision, or did it just happen?

I was like you DG, I knew that I loved him but, I wasn't about to say it first for fear that he didn't feel the same way.

[Deleted User 2085]

I was on an assignment, after our first date, which caused communication to be prohibited.
I was worried she would take my lack of a call as a rejection.
I used a local post system to send an unanimous card which said only
"I love you."
It was sent to "Tall Blond Babe" c/o the modeling agency. She received it.
This was the first time either of us said it.
When I returned, for our second date, I made certain she heard it in person.
That card did much as she had no idea why i did not call after that first date.
What pleased me so much was the fact, in spite of there being no information on the card to identify me, she knew it was from me. That first date had quite an affect on us both.

[KatieMarie]

I was head over heels in love with him, but like you I didn’t want to rock the boat. When he FINALLY told me “I love youL it was such a happy relief.

[Pearl]

DH is great with his hands (yes, yes, get that mind out of the gutter bedroom). After following me around at small group for months, and many little attentions he finally made me some jewelry out of some Lapis Lazul from a family rock hounding trip. But he had forgot it that day. Well that was the last straw for me. He hadn't let me know where the relationship was headed, and I was NOT about to accept gifts from a "just friend" kind of guy. So the following week when he actually brough the gift, I turned it down and told him (politely) he shouldn't leave a girl in the dark. He was shocked, and misunderstood me at first, so he skirted around a half hearted, "Well, I don't think I'm ready for a relationship yet." So we left it at that.

But he told me later that he spent 3 days without sleep and barely eating because he realized I might go elsewhere. He met me at my work then and told me those magical words. We started dating not much later.