Post in this section can be read by guests, but ARE NOT seen by search engines.
- California King
- Posts: 643
- Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2021 9:00 am
- Location: Here and there
But nothing, nothing is comparable to the experience of having children. My life has been immensely more valuable, meaningful and purposeful. The only way I can describe it is a religious experience - you can talk about it as much as you like to an atheist, it's pointless. You have either been through it, or not.
So I'm not sure what I can say. That I feel I have been part of the divine experience, that I have lived and loved, that I know I could kill and die for my children if I had to? That I have seen Life deeper than I could have every imagined? That nothing I have ever done or achieved is comparable to being a father?
I know this sounds strange but in some ways DW and I are lucky - there was no dilemma or decision making for us. We were dating and she got pregnant accidentally; the decision was made for us. Thank God, for arranging it for us.
(As I final few words, I must admit I also feel strongly that any society where children are being viewed as a burden, motherhood is devalued and women in large numbers lose the desire to have children, is a society committing suicide.)
-learning that the God of creation has trusted you with a life inside of you!
-feeling a baby inside your body! From the first little wiggles to watching a full grown babies kick and move inside you! Amazing!
-the bonding that occurs as your husband helps you get through a birth.
-holding your newly born baby and kissing their head!
-nursing and the incredible bond that is created with your child.
-amazing calming hormones that are released when your milk lets down...every time you nurse!
-your baby falling asleep in your arms.
-seeing your baby fall asleep in your spouses arms.
-first smiles and all the firsts.
-their infectious giggles and laughs.
-seeing your baby become a big brother or sister and the joy on their face!
-when your child comes to snuggle with you in bed, especially in the morning.
-watching them sacrifice for others.
-reading stories all cuddled on the sofa.
-sharing something new...a cool critter you find, a new food that tastes different, watching something you’ve never seen before, learning at a museum together.
-being so proud of them for something they worked hard to accomplish.
-crying and consoling each other in grief.
-watching them grow and mature.
-seeing them accept Jesus as their Lord.
-serving the Lord together side by side.
-having them encourage you on a tough day.
-seeing them grow into amazing adults.
Obviously, just as there are those who are perfectly within God's plan to never marry, there are those couples who are perfectly within God's plan to remain a family of two. (I fought hard with myself to be ready and willing in case that was His plan for us, for me, because I desperately wanted us to have children!)
For me a lot of it was about wanting what comes after me to be better than what I came from. My DH and I work hard to ensure that our marriage is a haven for us, a safe space of love and acceptance. And we've done a good job. I guess in some ways, we just wanted to invite more to the party.
What else has God given us our freedom, time, money, and energy for but to make what comes after better than what came before, to prepare us for Heaven, and to share in the glory of His love?
Not for the same reasons as your wife, but I am on the same side as your wife. It would be interesting to hear her views on the topic of children.