Post in this section can be seen by guests and search engines.
- Posts: 7837
- Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2020 8:45 pm
- Location: All I know is I'm not home yet
Beyond that, I'll bring up some unsolicited thoughts that I suspect many here disagree with... My question for singles, both male and female, would be--why do you feel you need a sex toy? What is its purpose? How does it benefit your physical and spiritual life now? Will there be future benefit? Is there the possibility it will cause future problems/issues?
I know practically 100% of contributors here strongly push masturbation for singles. Stated reasons include it reducing temptation, learning/understanding your body, decreasing discomfort due to lack of release, etc. However, for some, including myself, it became a huge stumbling block. I didn't M to O until I was 18 yr old, and doing so lead to me having sinful fantasies way more than I did previously, and then I quickly added porn to the mix (which I didn't watch before M-ing to O). The intensity of the pleasure response I got from masturbating was quite addictive, and so it lead me into many sinful things I previously avoided during my high-school years as way to increase the pleasure. Now I realize not everyone is like me, but this is just an example of advice that works for some but not others.
I feel that embracing sex toys for singles is a step further past pushing M for singles. So I ask the same questions as above about it being necessary or helpful. With the exception of being able to bring one needed release when they're incapable of doing so manually, many of the reasons stated for supporting solo M don't really make sense with embracing sex toys when single.
1 Cor 10:23 says: “All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. I ponder how much that applies here and whether toys, especially when not needed for general release, are at all helpful for singles in the long run. It's not at all hard to find stories on Reddit and the like of men getting "death grip" and women getting the equivalent due to masturbation habits. And while some may consider it immature, if I was a single looking for marriage and came across someone that was using sex toys all the time for self pleasure, I don't know how well that'd go over. As an example, we frequently use a dildo that's ~40% bigger than me in our MB and it's been great (she enjoys that in a way that I can't provide), but had my wife-to-be been rocking that by herself before we ever met, I'm not sure how well that'd go over. And I feel the same about single guys and strokers, prostate massagers, etc.
I know that I've seen some people say that when they were single they just M'd quickly and as straightforwardly as possible to get it over with as a way to avoid the temptation to fantasize that can come with longer sessions. They really just treated it like the release valve it supposedly is. Saving certain things for marriage may, in fact, be the best option sometimes and for some people.
And as full disclosure for those who don't know me/my past--I am a huge proponent of toys in the MB. My wife requires a vibrator to O, and has never O'd any other way. Despite this, I wanted to bring up the issue on the why you want to pursue this.
Just make sure you've got privacy as well as time to use it, and don't be surprised if it's not as often as you'd like.
Acquire wisdom! Acquire understanding!
Do not abandon her, and she will guard you;
Love her, and she will watch over you. - Proverbs 4: 5-6
You have been given some useful ideas. I have one more "stealth" option. I was kinda shocked a few years ago when I read that teen girls were using this item as a toy. But apparently it was quite popular, at least for a while. Dunno if it still is or not. But it certainly would be "stealth" enough.k.a. forest wrote: ↑Sun Jul 30, 2023 9:23 am I've been wanting to buy a sex toy for some time, but I haven't had the nerve to do it.
I've thought about buying online, but I'm concerned about getting unwanted promotions in the mail from the retailer (I still live with my parents unfortunately and my mom is narrow minded about sex things; I sure don't want her to know I bought a sex toy).
I've thought about going to a drug store or a regular retailer like Walmart, but I haven't worked up the nerve to do it. Being able to use cash or a gift card at self check out would be ideal.
An electric toothbrush.
Edited to add:
Did not see yesterday's post that you got something. Congrats! Hope you enjoy it a lot.
I would've never guessed, but it makes sense!DaveW wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:16 am
You have been given some useful ideas. I have one more "stealth" option. I was kinda shocked a few years ago when I read that teen girls were using this item as a toy. But apparently it was quite popular, at least for a while. Dunno if it still is or not. But it certainly would be "stealth" enough.
An electric toothbrush.